I wrote this ironically in the notes section on my phone late at night after a day that by the end of it, I felt I had wasted almost just waiting for “something” to happen. For a text to come through, for something new to happen on Instagram or just some kind of incoming piece of news via notifications on my phone. I suppose this day wasn’t all doom and gloom, though, as I key it out, it is sounding a bit sad.
Moving on, I got really pissed off at myself for doing so and for not beginning the day with this line of thinking being automatic, but then I gave myself a break and admitted for the first time, that I am one of those people who’s world has been shaped by the Internet and the many devices it is available through.
Despite my wanting this so badly not to occur, softly and slowly through clever marketing and colouring, it happened. I’ve written before about how having an awareness of a behaviour, habit, mannerism or anything for that matter that we no longer wish to do or have, is the first step in taking control, well, I believe anyway. And I have written before about switching off for a while and just being, and hell, I even penned a chapter in my first book about it too I do believe (despite the fact I’ve read it 12 times, shit’s been busy!).
So can you imagine me, this all together and grounded human being (ha ha) coming to the realisation at 11:30 pm with an alarm set for 5 am the next day that my life is seemingly being consumed by technology and people I will never ever meet, and what is worse, I have been and continue to allow it?
Tsk Tsk I hear you say, I know, I know, I was just as disappointed in myself, not mad, but disappointed, you know that one, that word, ugh, that feeling when it is said to you.
I read this fantastically grounding piece recently and while there is so much to take from it, one thing I took from it is that the world does not revolve around any one being, it does not revolve around me, and it does not revolve around you. I know that this piece of news is really nothing new, but I feel it is good to re-visit every now and again when the right now of the world can become a little overbearing shall we say.
This got me thinking, what do any of my trivial worries really matter? What purpose are they really serving besides activating my brain at the end of the day that I wasted whereas I could have just had that realization at 6 am when I rose and chose to do something constructive. But no, those bastard thoughts are reserved for the hour that is darkest before the dawn, where, if you are not aware, they can take hold of you and become all consuming, consumed by the dark before the light penetrates through the next morning.
It seems like such a first world issue, this notion of turning off phone notifications in order to achieve some kind of back to basics living, but good lord, it really is not far from the truth, well, in this first world anyway, and from what I can find on google (oh God I am further gone than I thought).
At a point in time, if one wanted to avoid someone or something, that was pretty much the long and the short of it. One could take the phone “off the hook” or just go about one’s day like one normally would hoping to God one wouldn’t run into the said situation or person. These days a lot of us are balls deep in our online footprint that the process of doing a full delete and rebuild is about a week’s work and six sessions with a psychologist under the Medicare Mental Health Plan (I’m not taking away from this service, just making a light point, keep your farms calm).
So some questions I come to are these; and not just for myself, but for all to ask and please do let me know what you think.
- Is hitting delete on the Internet and leaving no trace, giving no warning and just getting back to life on the ground such a bad thing?
- Is it rude?
- Is it possible?
- Is it pissy to feel a bit anxious and completely out or sorts the second, minute or hour that our connection to the online world is not present?
- Is switching back to manual, taking back control and turning off notifications a way forward?